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mad or upset, I tend to go quiet or even missing. I just lose the will to talk and completely withdraw into myself.
This I can relate to way too much,I just go missing and stay away from everyone to avoid saying bad things to ppl when I'm like that. 'learned this the hard way'
Anyway from my part,probably a long one and pathetic but still:
I'm highly anti social 'if thats the correct world' and I don't talk much unless I have to so the ppl who are the opposite can annoy me very easily.Actually I'm annoyed by ppl cause of a lot of small reasons,often they don't even know what made me mad.
For example ppl who think they are funny 'attention wh ores' but they aint and I just want them to shut up,same goes to ppl who spam a lot of smileys and childish stuff.
This is also a problem in MMOs cause even the idea of being in a big guild with ppl I don't know makes me sick and annoyed and cause of this I had to quit some other games since you can't solo everything after a certain point:P
Talking to more than 1 person at a time also frustrates me,I just don't like multi tasking in any form and split my attention.
I can't seem to properly appreciate the ppl who actually put up with my bullshet and are nice to me,this makes me feel pretty bad but I just can't do anything about it..
I have serious problems starting conversations,both irl and even online.If I'm not talked to then I rarely talk to ppl even tho I do want to talk to them 'its stupid right?'.
I don't know what to do when I like someone and it frustrates me and at the end I just push the person away from me 'well done',and I'm also afraid of hurting that person with my usual crap.
On the other hand I'm probably even more afraid of being hurt myself,it takes a very long time for me to 'heal' somewhat.
I'm overly sensitive and often too serious in general and can turn from peaceful to pissed off in a matter of seconds and then throw shet at ppl for whatever reason.
I overthink stuff,even things that I should not care about anymore or totally insignificant things and sometimes its so bad that I can't even sleep properly.
I hate my own birthday,it makes me feel like 'yay you are 1 year older and still a worthless piece of shet'.
I also have something like a dark/evil side that can be triggered if I'm pushed too far emotionally and its really not pretty.
I have no idea what the eff I'm supposed to do with my life,even if I have ideas I lose all of the motivation very fast and just don't care.
In the past sometimes I thought and felt like that I'm not a bad person but I've slowly realized that at the end non of my 'nice' things makes up for all the shet I do only because I can't deal with ppl and with my own emotions.This also leads me to feel like that probably it would be better if I just stay alone and not bother with relations with other ppl.
My doctor is 'concerned' about my condition and wants me to go to a therapy for years already but I keep ignoring it and not even telling my parents,I don't want them think of me as a total fuckup. 'even tho I am'
Considering all that there are still a very few ppl who are nice to me and I can call them friends but it also makes me feel that I don't deserve such. (less)
Well my 'opinion' doesn't mean much since I've stoped being active for like 6 months already but still.
Even when I played somewhat actively it was mainly S2 raids and some S1 ones like … (more)Liono/Keaghan/Succubus/Muir and I did enjoy some random Ship/Cmi runs.
S1+2 is pretty much nope now,full map runs are gone and I'm not a fan of S3 raids in general 'Regina/Lugh is ok'.
So now I just honestly don't know what to do ingame,I can still do S2 but its just not the same especially with this 4 ppl party thing.
4 is ok if you have friends to run with but I don't even have that many left playing this game,lol.
Playing with 3 'randoms' is not really my thing,it just feels weird and not exactly fun to me.I could host 8 so that part is not really an improvement in my case.
This damage change is also nope,I liked how back in the days I could feel comfortable with a +10/11 and could very well pull my weight or even more.Now a brainded person can just faceroll the keyboard with tons of ADD dmg and wreck the rest of the party who maybe played properly.Oh and ofc on top of that go ahead and reward that player for it
I'm not really competent in that regard anyway but its just wrong imo.
And like others mentioned,the game just feels 'hollow/weird' now,its not the same Vindi that I've played for around 7 years..
The quality of life changes are nice but its kinda too late for them imo.
Changes are not always good or needed,sometimes theres no need to change things cause of the risk of making it only worse.
Sure Vindi needed changes but not into this direction..
Oh well,at least I did not spend much money on this game and even then only cosmetics like inners/hairs,etc.
There are things that I will miss from this game when it completely dies like the design of armors/weapons and that its not a typical copy/paste game ,tried many MMOs but I like this one the most in that regard.
At least I've made some lasting friendships from this game which will probably last longer than this game so thats something.
Now that Diablo III is getting the Necromancer expansion and Kritika is coming to Open Beta soon, I have other stuff I can dedicate my time in to.
~GanonG34
You can already play Kritika on some 'noname?' server but it is official with fatigue system and whatnot.Its a fun game imo.
I will also check out that Necro but I'm mainly playing singleplayer games now that Vindi 'failed' to get me back:P
